Crying, Waiting, Hoping...

So...my friend Laurie had a question today on Facebook. She asked "What exactly is a good night's sleep?" I actually chuckled when she posted that question, because as always, my dear friend is so timely!

Last night our son decided he was going to cry all night long! Seriously. Now you all know that Jack has been sick...he was sick from Feb 9th thru first few days of March. And that sickness really interrupted his sleep. I mean, Adam and I had to wake our son every 3 to 4 hours for breathing treatments. You do that for a month and you get a baby with a habit of partying in the wee hours of the morning.

But over the last week, Adam and I have been trying to talk Jack into sleeping thru the night again. This is VERY IMPORTANT! Not just for comfort, but because as of next Tuesday he will be at my moms with Sydney while I am UCLA. My mom will go crazy if Jack keeps crying all night long!

So...last night Jack woke at 115 am and started crying. And I waited it out for a bit. Just to see if he would go back to sleep on his own. No luck. So I got up and comforted him and loved him and started his music and mobile and laid him back down. Usually this works. Not last night.
Jack really started crying now...Crying and Crying and Crying. He was Crying and I was Waiting and Hoping that he would just wear out and go back to sleep. No Luck.

So...I went in again, did the same routine, as well as double checking diaper etc. But Jack just kept crying, well screaming really. Then he started throwing himself around the crib. I had to clear everything out of his way. He seriously was throwing himself back and hitting his little head on the rails! UGH!

So I picked him up and calmed him down and rocked and loved on him. Getting him calm took about 25 minutes. And when he looked sleepy I tried to put him back in his crib but the whimpering started again. So I snuck out hoping that he would roll and go to sleep. I no longer slid into my bed when I heard the crying start in full force again!

So...WHAT DO YOU DO? Do you give in to a flailing baby? Isn't he just trying to boss me around? Or is he just really needing his mommy to give in? Jack is really stubborn. Adam and I see that streak in our child already. Even when we tell him No sternly for things that he gets into around the house...like eating dirt, or licking wires...he just looks at us and does it some more.

So I laid there in bed not really knowing what to do. Do I keep "ferberizing" (isn't that what they call it?) Where I keep reassuring him I am there, but don't bring him into bed with me or do I give into to his tantrum? Do I just take him to the living room and hug him and play with him so he stops screaming and waking up his dad? UGH!

Aren't moms supposed to know what to do!?!?!?!?

So...at 230 after countless hugs and pats...Jack finally called it quits. He finally took a bottle I had been offering him and fell asleep. Was that the right thing to do, to give him a bottle I mean? He just had a bottle at 11 p.m. Shouldn't he be able to hold out till morning and not eat during the night anymore? Won't I just be teaching him to demand a bottle in the middle of the night? Did I cave? Am I a sucker?

So..what is a good nights sleep? I DUNNO! Even after Jack fell asleep and I laid him peacefully in his crib and I crawled back into bed next to my snoring husband, I did not get a good nights sleep. I laid there and felt bullied by a 22lb tyrant. I love this little guy..but how do I show him love and teach him good sleep habits at the SAME TIME? And I wondered, how did I get thru this with Sydney? Why can't I remember what I did then?
And then it dawned on me.....

Maybe us moms block these hard nights from our memories, like childbirth pain, so we will consider having another kid!
Or maybe I just can't remember due to lack of sleep!